Percy Portrait For Sale on eBay
One of the benefits of being artist-in-residence at my estate is that I will take the time to sit for
a portrait and allow you to sell it on eBay and keep 50% of the proceeds. Harmonious Josh has shown the type of initiative that got him named artist-in-residence in the first place and already has a portrait of me for sale on eBay (click on my portrait on HJ's site to go to the auction).
The anonymous jerk that runs ihatepercywalker.com is currently the highest bidder. Let's not allow this important work fall into the wrong hands! Bid like a hedge fund manager!
The anonymous jerk that runs ihatepercywalker.com is currently the highest bidder. Let's not allow this important work fall into the wrong hands! Bid like a hedge fund manager!

Hear, hear!
Nothing funny to add, just want to add my support for the A-in-R's fine work.
50%!?!?! You know that the "starving" in "starving artist" is not supposed to be literal, right?
Oh well. It's an honor, regardless. I can supplement my income with the proceeds of doing your yard work.
If percyhater wins, please remember to tell me his/her delivery address. Thanks!
What if hater will only pay on the condition that I keep his address secret? Quite the moral conundrum.
The anonymous jerk won! C'est un tragedie! Zut alor!
Pardon my French.
HJosh, Artist in Residence (and Groundskeeper)
It concerns me that a billionaire is consistently getting outbid by his nemesis. Perhaps my allegiance is misplaced?
This was all by design, HJ. My security team was able to determine the origination point of the bids and are now following the culprit. They'll pounce when he has his rendezvous with a local artist who is supposed to deface the portrait. We haven't been able to figure out who the artist is.
Where are they meeting? If someone is defacing my work, I might need to do a little pouncing myself.
I was under the impression that your work came already defaced? You mean it's supposed to look like that?
Mr. Ease, it took you four days to come up with that one? Don't tell me you were busy - I know you don't have a real job.